Adoption and You

Adoption of a Friend's baby/child

What a wonderful part of our practice.  We had a call from a lady who wants to adopt a baby from a friend of hers.  The friend is unable to care for another child and considers it a gift to both her friend and the baby to allow the adoption.

Now the issues. 

My new client thought adoption was a very expensive process.  In many cases the attorney fees are less than $4,000!   They become more expensive as the work increases, international adoption, interstate placement, surrogacy and other factors make for a much more expensive process.  Much of that is for the care of the pregnant mother as well as the costs of keeping things legal and on track.

She was afraid that she would have to keep the adoption a secret from her child to be.  That is a decision for her and the birth mother to decide.  It can be open with everyone know to the child. or closed with the child growing up knowing only his/her adopting parents.

She wanted to help the mother with some support and medical care assistance but was afraid that would be considered "buying" a baby, an illegal prospect at best.  If done properly with all finances in the open and depending upon what is paid for and what is given, it can be perfectly fine to help the birth mother.  That is something that you need speak with legal counsel to determine.

She thought that the state might object to the adoption as there are other people waiting for babies.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  If the birth mother wants her friend or family to raise her child and adopt it there is a simple process with the state to confirm that you are not a bad risk. 

They will do a study that includes looking at the home, criminal records and a full background check.  And no, things that you might consider as bad may not be.  For instance I had one client who had a troubled youth, including police involvement up until he was 19 years old.  DCF's report glowed.  He has been clean for a long time, has an exemplary work and volunteering record and was the person of choice by his sister. 

Cal us if you have any concerns regarding adoption and the whole process.  I would be happy to talk with you about the facts of your situation.

Bruce